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Unit 5 The Tapestry of Friendship
by Ellen Goodman

International Friendship Day
Friendship Day occurs on the first Sunday of August, time to recognize your friends and their contribution to your life. Friendship helps to bring peace and positivism to the globe - a great reason to celebrate! Friends come in many shapes, sizes and guises: school friends, work colleagues, siblings, partners, parents, pets and neighbors.

"My friends are my estate." - Emily Dickinson "I can never think of promoting my convenience at the expense of a friend's interest and inclination." - George Washington "True happiness consists not in the multitude of friends, but in their worth and choice." - Samuel Johnston "The only reward of virtue is virtue; the only way to have a friend is to be one." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Negative quotes
"A woman can become a man's friend only in the following stages - first an acquaintance, next a mistress, and only then a friend." - Anton Chekhov "Men kick friendship around like a football and it doesn't seem to crack. Women treat it like glass and it falls to pieces" -Anne Lindbergh - Sent in by Sandy Macbeth

Men vs. Women friendship
"The difference between men friends and women friends is that men tend to do things together, women tend to just be together." —Art Jahnke In childhood girls talk about school, clothes, and their wishes and needs. Boys on the other hand talk about sports, motors, and locations —Fehr Beverley Men have a tendency to avoid a high degree of intimacy with each other, but do however acknowledge intimacy and friendship in the form of joking and laughter.

Women talk about themselves, their feelings, doubts, fears, love relationships, families, homes, and problems. Men talk about competition and aggression, and things they have seen or heard. They discuss work, sports, politics, social issues, money, business, cars, weather, and traffic —Monsour "Men's friendships are often built around shared activities attending a ball game, playing cards, working on a project at the office." — Devito "Friendship is not possible between two women one of whom is very well dressed." —Laurie Colwin

I. Background information:
1. About the text: This text is taken from Close to Home, which was published by The Boston Globe Company / Washington Post Writers Group in 1979. 2. About the author: Ellen Goodman, is a Boston Globe Online columnist and a stylish writer(有个性的) with a humanizing touch on any issue, public or personal. She is widely acclaimed as a voice of sanity, and readers depend on her to help them make sense of their changing lives and relationships.

II. Text Analysis
The text distinguishes two kinds of friendship: that between men and that between women.
Part I paragraph 1-2 Part II paragraph 3-6 Part III paragraph 7-18 Part IV paragraph 19

Part I paragraph 1-2 In this part the author reveals what kind of film the woman had just seen and what attitude she had to it. 1.What kind of film did the woman see? Portrayed all aspects of friendship between two women: its fragility, its resiliency and its connecting function. No car chase or fierce gunfight. The end was of no great significance either. 2.What did she think of it? Gentle and moving

1.It was, in many ways, a slight movie. →In many aspects , it was a simple, ordinary movie. 2. big-budget chase scene: A car-chase scene that costs a lot of money budget预算;预算费;生活费,经费[(+for)] -budget: comb.form复合形 "经费的","拨款的"a low-budget movie一部低预算的电影 3. shoot-out: gunfight 4. cosmic: 1) very great Eg: The earthquake was a disaster of ~ scale. 2) relating to the universe (宇宙的) What happens in their lives is influenced by ~ forces.

Para2: 5. affecting: Inspiring or
capable of inspiring strong emotion; moving an affecting scene 惨状 an affecting sight 动人的情景 6. slowly, it panned across the tapestry of friendship… Step by step it gave an allsided view of the complex structure of friendship… /slowly,gave a panoramic , [p?n?‘r?mik]全景的 picture of friendship…

Pan: n平锅 浅盘 盆地 硬土层 拍摄全景 平锅,浅盘 盆地,硬土层 平锅 浅盘,盆地 硬土层,拍摄全景 vt. vi. swing to follow an object to have an all-sided view 上下左右移动,摇镜头 淘洗 淘金;[口 严厉地批评 上下左右移动 摇镜头,淘洗 淘金 口]严厉地批评 摇镜头 淘洗,淘金 The camera panned slowly across the crowd. 镜头慢慢转向人群 The movie was panned by all the critics. 那部电影被影评人批评得一文不值, 那部电影被影评人批评得一文不值

Tapestry:1) A heavy cloth woven with rich, :

often varicolored designs or scenes, usually hung on walls for decoration and sometimes used to cover furniture.织锦 ,挂毯 织锦 tapestry carpet 用染色经线织成图案的地毯 tapestry satin 织锦缎

Vintage tapestry pillow

2) Something felt ) to resemble a richly and complexly designed cloth: the tapestry of world history. 纷繁复杂的世界史 tapestry of friendship 多姿多彩的友谊

fragile:['fr?d?ail] adj. breakable,brittle,weak n. fragility [fr?'d?iliti] resilient: [ri'zili?nt] adj. flexible, elastic resiliency [ri'zili?nsi] n. When you visit the elderly, you remind them that they are loved, and you remind yourself of how deeply we all feel the need for compassion. When you help the homeless find shelter, you remove the pain of need, and rediscover the resiliency of the human spirit. (人类精神的恢复) ---President Bush

Part II paragraph 3-6 This part describes the woman’s observation of the shift of focus of the cinema and advances the argument for the distinction between the two types of friendship: that between men and that between women.

Para3. Q: Why does the author list the movies the woman had seen? The three share the same theme: the friendship between women 1. drastic :adj. extreme or radical a drastic remedy烈性的药物 take drastic measures 采取果断措施[激烈手段] drastic purgatives猛 泻药 a drastic debate激烈的辩论 make drastic change做彻底的改变
2. Male Buddy movies –Female Friendship flicks Buddy: pal, partner, companion, chum, sidekick, crony

Flick: n. 快速的轻打,轻打声,弹开 vt.vi.轻弹,轻轻拂去,忽然摇动 , (infml) 电影

Para4: 1.this wasn’t another binge of trendiness, but a kind of cinema veritie. binge :A drunken spree or revel. 狂欢,狂闹 狂欢, 1)A period of unrestrained, immoderate selfindulgence. 2) A period of excessive or uncontrolled indulgence in food or drink: an eating binge. 暴食 a week-end binge 周末狂饮 a shopping binge 抢购 a gambling binge 嗜赌狂; 嗜赌狂; trendy: of or in accord with the latest fad or fashion trendy clothes. Look at that trendy couple - kitted up all the latest gear! 瞧那对时髦夫妇,打扮多么入时。 瞧那对时髦夫妇,打扮多么入时。 The trendy rock group is only a flash-in-the-pan. 这个新潮摇滚乐队只是昙花一现。 这个新潮摇滚乐队只是昙花一现。

(cinema-veritie)真实电影 真实电影
Veritie:a genre emphasizing realism and : naturalism

This was not simply a shift from one fashion to another, but a truthful description of friendship. 这不只是另一种追逐潮流的狂热,而是对 友谊的一种真实的写照。

Para5. 1.Across millions of miles of celluloid, the ideal of friendship had always been male... celluloid:赛璐珞 a kind of plastic once used to make cinema film (最早的电影胶片) Metonymy:转喻 substituting the name of an : attribute or feature for the name of the thing itself ( celluloid→film) In numerous movies, the model of friendship had always been between males 2.There had been something almost atavistic about these visions of attachment—as if producers culled their plots from some pop anthropology book on male bonding.

Atavistic:返祖现象的 There is something quite atavistic about a group of people sitting down together to a good dinner 一群人坐在一起饱餐一顿,这当中有一种相当原始的味道 attachment: affection, love. here friendship cull: choose from various sources eg. It’s a collection of fascinating stories culled from a lifetime of experience. The data had been culled from a variety of sources. bonding : a close personal relationship that forms between people Anthropology is a science dealing with man and his origins. It seems that male friendship had always been reflected in a primitive way —as if the producers selected their stories from some popular anthropology book on the friendship between men..

3. Movies portrayed the idea that only men, those direct descendants of hunters and Hemingways, inherited a primal capacity for friendship. Primal: essential Hemingways: Metonymy. Hemingways→ People of Hemingway type 海明威似的人物 see note7 Only men, the offspring of hunters and Hemingways, were born with the instinctive

capacity of making friends.

inherit: 1) receive (money, a house etc.) from someone after they have died When I took on the job of manager, I inherited certain financial problems. 2) be born with (a physical or mental quality that a parent, grandparent or other relative has) Rosie inherited her red hair from her mother. The child has an inherited disease which attacks the immune system. 4. pick on: be critical of Don’t pick on me. 别跟我过不去啊

Para6. 1.Well, that duality must have been mortally wounded in some shoot-out at the You’re OK, I’m OK Corral. The two sides must have been fatally wounded in the OK Corral gunfight. mortal: n. human adj. fatal, deadly, lethal antonym: immortal mortal wound 致命伤 a mortal disease 绝症 2. subtle: slight, delicate

Part III paragraph 7-18 This part discusses in detail the distinctions between the Male Buddiness and the Female Friendship. The subtle distinction between male and female friendships: Generally speaking, the former is action-oriented while the latter is emotionoriented, i. e., the Male Buddiness is based on the need for co-operation in the activities that men are engaged in or in the adverse situations they are confronted with. In contrast, the Female Friendship borders on love, the need for mutual emotional support.

1. A woman’s friendship borders more closely on love than a man’s. A woman’s friendship is more closely to love than a man’s. Border on: 1) to be very close to, being something extreme His confidence bordered on arrogance. 你的批评近于粗暴。( 。(译 你的批评近于粗暴。(译) Your critics borders on rudeness. CF. The area borders on the Yorkshire Dales. 这个地区与约克郡河谷国家公园邻接 。 2) form the boundary of 男人之间以高尚,友好的行为打动彼此, 男人之间以高尚,友好的行为打动彼此,而女人之间不需要太多的证 只需要多一些爱的表示和表达就可以了。 据,只需要多一些爱的表示和表达就可以了。 2. adversity : n. hardship misfortune trouble Mr. Huang has been a good friend to me in adversity or in prosperity. 不管我处于逆境还是顺境, 黄先生一直是我的好友。

A-is a good disciple. A-is a great schoolmaster. .[谚]逆境是锻炼人的最好场所。 A friend is known in adversity. 在患难之中才能看出(真假)朋友。 A-makes strange bedfellows. [谚]难中不择友,饥不择食。 A-acquaints men with strange bedfellows. 3. palpable: noticeable a palpable mistake 明显的错误 palpable results 具体可见的成果 4. Accessory: 1)a supplementary component that improves capability accessory of a bicycle 自行车的附件(附属的)装饰品,搭配物 2)accomplice从犯;帮凶 (someone who helps another person commit a crime = accessary) 伙伴如影随形的紧密联系着,从一个活动到另一个活动。 伙伴如影随形的紧密联系着,从一个活动到另一个活动。

5. “through the wars” together — corporate or athletic or military: through the commercial, athletic or military strives together. 6. They had to soldier together: had to struggle together 7. count :consider or regarded as 认为;被认为是 I didn’t think his grudging remarks really counted as an apology. 失业人员都应该得到政府帮助(译) Any unemployed person counts as deserving government help. count down 倒数,用倒数方式计算 count off 报数,报出数字 count on依赖,依靠,期待,指望 count out v.点数,拳击中判输 take the count v. 被判输 Count against对…不利 对 不利 You must not count his inexperience against him. 你不可因为他没经验就认为他不行

8. confidence:信任,自信,厚脸皮;秘密 confidence game 〔美国〕=confidence trick 〔英国〕 骗局 9.loathsome: disgusting, nasty 10. Buddies hang tough together; friends hang on to each other. Buddies hold on together in the face of adversity; friends are tied together for emotional support. Hang together团结一致,齐心协力 Hang on [upon] 依赖,依靠 Q.What’s the fundamental difference between buddies and friends? :Buddies are men’s companions: they are connected by common activities. Friends, in the narrow sense in the text, are women’s companions; they are associated by emotional attachment. Without shared activities, there would be no buddies for men; without love there would be no true friends for women.

Q: what point is Para13 meant to illustrate? It is meant to illustrate that friends hang onto each other and confess their worst to each other. 11. wretched with embarrassment:unhappy / depressed with embarrassment. 12.made it better: reduced her unhappiness; made her less unhappy 13. She knew so many men who had been trained in restraint, afraid of each other’s judgment or awkward with each other’s affection. She knew so many men who had been taught to control their feelings ,afraid of facing each other’s evaluations or embarrassed with each other’s affection 14.A catalogue of similar things, especially bad things, is a number of them considered or discussed one after another.

15. grievances :委屈,冤情,苦况 The trade union leader spoke about the grievances of the workers. 工会领袖述说工人们的苦情。 have a grievance against sb. 怀恨某人; 对...心怀不满 pour out grievance 诉苦 16.The only relationship that gave meaning to the claustrophobic life of George Babbitt had been with Paul Riesling. What made the claustrophobic life of George Babbitt meaningful had been his relationship with Paul Riesling; without his relationship with Paul Riesling George Babbitt would have found his claustrophobic life meaningless

Part IV paragraph 19
This part is the Conclusion of the text, which restates the distinction between the two types of friendship. Buddies are those you can do things together with in your lifetime, but friends are those with whom you can share roses and thorns in your life.

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